The wait for information seems for many to be a painful and anxious period, well not for me. I unfortunately have the personality flaw that ensures I take on the stress/worry/anxiety of all of those around me. (A fantastic distraction during the 2ww assuming you enjoy little sleep) Tim and I have always been positive people and always without fail see the glass as "half full" rather than "half empty" figuratively speaking. This personality trait ensures that we attract a lot of people into our lives and this I love, I'm a very people and family oriented person (moreso than Tim) and at times I will even put our lives on hold to help other people. Is this a bad thing??? Well I personally don't believe so and Tim and I have such a strong relationship that it is not really affected. I get HUGE amount of satisfaction and happiness out of helping other people, in the past 6 months I have even gone to such extreme lengths to see others happy and smile that subconsciously I have been letting my own happiness fall behind at times. Anyhow I have something I need to get off my chest as it is causing me some slight negativity and I like to resolve negativity before I allow it to effect me.
Two people I consider close friends (as close as family even) have two great little boys. She called me the other night to tell me that she was pregnant which is fantastic news. Really very happy for her as she has wanted to have another child. BUT, he did not. Long story short, she wants it and he does not. Now I know that really this is none of my business and nothing to do with me, but there is a little something inside me that is creating the slightest amount of negativity and resentment at the fact they have kids and "clearly the ability to have more" while we must travel to the opposite end of the world and devote every last ounce of energy and emotion. As I said I'm not a negative or spiteful person I really needed to get this off my chest, I'm not one to tell another what they should or shouldn't do and she even asked me what she should do which my reply was "that I am too biased in my opinion right now with what we are trying to achieve with the help of India and that I can't answer it" I really think that statement just says to her in a nice way "keep the baby it is a gift that you can have them don't take that for granted fool" without actually saying that. Anyhow my "rant" is over now and I feel much better for sharing these thoughts and feelings.
On a brighter note the weather here in Melbourne is really starting to warm up and the days are longer. I could type for hours here but it's time to get up and go to work "bloody Monday mornings"
Thanks for reading and thank you to everyone who comments, I really look forward to hearing from you each and every post :)
Xxx
Chris and Tim
Two people I consider close friends (as close as family even) have two great little boys. She called me the other night to tell me that she was pregnant which is fantastic news. Really very happy for her as she has wanted to have another child. BUT, he did not. Long story short, she wants it and he does not. Now I know that really this is none of my business and nothing to do with me, but there is a little something inside me that is creating the slightest amount of negativity and resentment at the fact they have kids and "clearly the ability to have more" while we must travel to the opposite end of the world and devote every last ounce of energy and emotion. As I said I'm not a negative or spiteful person I really needed to get this off my chest, I'm not one to tell another what they should or shouldn't do and she even asked me what she should do which my reply was "that I am too biased in my opinion right now with what we are trying to achieve with the help of India and that I can't answer it" I really think that statement just says to her in a nice way "keep the baby it is a gift that you can have them don't take that for granted fool" without actually saying that. Anyhow my "rant" is over now and I feel much better for sharing these thoughts and feelings.
On a brighter note the weather here in Melbourne is really starting to warm up and the days are longer. I could type for hours here but it's time to get up and go to work "bloody Monday mornings"
Thanks for reading and thank you to everyone who comments, I really look forward to hearing from you each and every post :)
Xxx
Chris and Tim
Oh I hear you!!! And I think you handled that beautifully and with dignity.
ReplyDeletePeople can be (intentionally or no) rather insensitive that we can't just "make a baby" when we feel like it. It hurts. Pure and simple.
This doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you human.
I'm so proud of you!
It's normal to feel the way you do. I get that way sometimes when I hear other parents making less-than-happy comments about having children or being a parent because it takes so much more effort and money on my end to achieve the same goal. It's like, why do people who don't want to be parents as much as I do, have it much easier than I? But that is life *sigh* When I am asked a question where I conflicted, I just say, "You have to do what is right for you". Such the HR response :)
ReplyDeleteYep - have had a few of those thoughts myself. People often take things for granted when they have never had to confront a barrier like we're all going through. Don't feel bad. Just think how much more you'll appreciate your child once it/they come along.
ReplyDeletehas been a series on in the UK about couples that keep having abortions and also seems to be a daily story of how children are not loved.
ReplyDeleteas you say, we have to devote everything, have weeks of worry (which iI hope turn into months) yet there people don't realise what they have.
Right, rant over - time for zzzzzz